Many a times we meet people and just connect. Before we know it we are texting, hanging out, sharing moments and boom! we call each other friends! I ain’t saying we should do “friendship applications”. But who is a friend? The comment box is open.
Personally i think, a friend is someone who is going to love you even when they know you are a brat. A person who will tell you the truth. He/she will not call your phone only when they need a favor but then just to check on you. They will laugh and cry with you. They want the best for you.
“What is love if you are not here with me?” Anyone who has watched Empire series is familiar with these lines. This particular one captures my attention because it is related to what am about to conference about. Well, i ain’t here to betalk about how to love, when to love and what loving should be like. But for insecurity.
Insecurity! What is insecurity? I am not here to bespeak about how many policemen and army officers we have in this country, or the military equipment we possess, the murders happening in Entebbe. Not even war or peace. Am here for issues like “why would you want someone to stay loyal to you yet you are a cheat?, why are you insecure, what makes one insecure?And how you can tame it”
First, Why are people insecure?
- Being insecure comes with low self esteem. When you are not confident of yourself. You do not believe in yourself and feel that you got to rely on someone to make you feel better. This sometimes makes you feel like you are not good enough for her/him. It impels fear of losing a person because you think they deserve better than what you can offer.
- Childhood environment. When you grow up in a family where no one helped you discover you, you will have insecurity issues. Most people use this to become relevant. They feel that they should rule in whatever way possible and in the long run, they are everywhere in their partners’ lives.
- Polygamous families. Sometimes children who grow up in this kind of family are so insecure. You watch your father get woman after woman, your mother cry day and night, and swear you will never go through the same. These are the kind who will mix the jealousy with insecurity. They don’t want any male species associating with their girlfriends and vice versa. They are suspicious even where it is not necessary.
- Heart broken . One of those reasons for alot of insecure cases. I do not think i need to explain this. It is obvious that when people come into and walk out of your life each other day, you will reach a point and think you are the problem. There are people who lose self confidence.
- Another is the cheating kind. Let me tell you something, no man or woman who is cheating wants to be cheated on. That is why they will always be suspicious at your male/female friends, when and where you hangout, who are having fun with etc etc . It is because they are chasing or filrting after every skirt their eyes can get on and they think you are going to betray them too.
- Trust Issues. If you do not trust your partner you will roll eyes at a mere call. Why are dating someone you think will cheat on you? That is not love.
But then, you can help yourself fight this vice.
Believe in yourself. Faithfullness. God . Self Love. Open mindedness. Postivity, try to see things in a different way. Get counselling.
Today is the last day of the beginning of a new month, make the best of it. Choose to do you and u will never regret. Most times people want to know whats happening in your life but you know nothing/little about them. Why should you always be the one who is willing to share your dirty laundry with them yet they ain’t consenting to participación su poseer.