Sometimes I sit in places and act invisible, not because I want to be alone but to make sure am in the right place at that particular time. Though mostly to find out what people think about certain things. So there is this place I usually get from lunch at campus, it is one of those you won’t find in the “1st class citizens” – rich people’s kids or “rich kids” and the attitude kind. It is an open kafunda. Enough of the bluh bluh………… This kafunda attracts a large number of the non-teaching staff that is; secretaries, cleaners, students etc etc. If you have read Houseboy, am about to sound like Ferdinand Oyono, “these black, yellow, light and brown ladies and gentlemen gather not only to feed the parasites in their intestines but to ‘trash talk’ their bosses. Yes, it is sad and disappointing that we always make others apart of our recreation time. What a muganda would call “lugambo”. The worst thing is that today it was a man, guys! A MAN! was the one leading the conversation.
As an employee, you may have a bad employer but hey, you have better things to do than go trashing them in public. This is a place where several students come have lunch from. What if you the boss you are trashing is his or her parent? What would you do if that student reported to their parent? This isn’t just about these rude employees but all of us. If someone hurt you, you should find a better way of letting it out than making it a public issue.
I looked at these employees and cried for them. I cried for the way they were being treated though cried much how they were letting out this information. In the loudest tones, clapping, laughing, parting each other’s back and many other uncoth things as if this would add more years to their life. Lets just learn where to hold certain conversations and how to communicate them.
As we celebrate our fathers, let’s not forget to also talk to the future fathers and hubbies. Which type of father are you? I often argue with people who think they will wait till they become fathers to be good dads. Its like saying I will not be nice to you if I dont know you. There is a story I read about a lady whose boyfriend always told, “waitwhenyoubecomepregnant, youwillseehowmuchIloveyou“. It was soothing to the ear. One day she tricked him into this “am pregnant thing” but afraid. “What can we do about it?
The first reply was; “abortthebaby!” Why? “Becauseyouseemworried.” Okay, let’s see the girl was scared of what her parents might do and he thought he was doing the right thing.” But hey, is abortion the best option? Couldn’t he as a man stand up for his unborn child and encourage her to stay strong! I asked myself ” where is the love?” And what was he thinking when having unprotected sex? Ofcourse the girl was disappointed and decided to keep quite. After weeks of the boyfriend’s silence, she told him that she had decided to keep the pregnancy and he had to act responsible as he was the father. The guy started to text less & her logs never missed any of his calls . When he did – he never asked about her situation. It was always one arguement after the other each day. Though the most captivating sentence was; “howdoyouwantmetoberesponsible?” This was after she asked him to act responsible for their pregnancy. Can you imagine?
Probably that was one of those lines to her into his bed. The good thing is that she learned the kind of guy he was before making a mistake. Back to the existent fathers. Are the kind of father you daughter or family is proud of or the kind who can done everything possible to make them feel resentment towards you? Being a father is a whole issue from husband to the mother of your children. Apart from paying tuition and buying home necessities. You need to indulge in your children everyday activities. Iam not saying you become a spy. You getting involved in your children daily life makes them become free with you which is an important thing to every parent.
Also as we celebrate fathers’ day, ask yourself what kind of relationship do I as a husband have with my wife. This is because the type of relationship between you and your wife affects your children. There are families where parents are always quarreling to an extent that when dad comes back home. Children go to their bedrooms becuase to avoid the noise martial noise from the two. I have also seen, read and heard about fathers who listen to their children more than the wife. The wivies are forced to send the child to ask for money because when she goes there, he will not believe or it takes an argument to hand her the money to buy whatever it is she wants.
The relationship you have with your partner will affect your children. Sometimes we wonder why some young men are violent and have no respect for men yet the environment they grew up from was the cause. We forget charity begins at home.
Otherwise, on this beautiful day I want to thank God for my daddy. He is one of the greatest men in my life. And I wish you all fathers out there a fabulous fathers’ day.