‘Can’t Hurt Me’ By David Goggins

Can’t Hurt Me is a story of domestic violence, racism, love, determination and self realization. A book worth your time.

The book centres on the family and majorly life of David Goggins. Despite everything he goes through as a child, David doesn’t let that define what he is capable of doing or becoming. He didn’t let what he went through in the hands of his father or people’s opinions about him pull him down.

Step Out Of Your Comfort Zone

What the fuck? I mean, seriously, what the fucking fuck? When was enough truly going to be enough? Was I willing to let my sorry present become a fucked-up future? How much longer would I wait, how many more years would I burn, wondering if there was some greater purpose out there waiting for me? I knew right then that if I didn’t make a stand and start walking the path of most resistance, I would end up in this mental hell forever.

“Even the best pep talk or self-help hack is nothing but a temporary fix. It won’t rewire your brain. It won’t amplify your voice or uplift your life. Motivation changes exactly nobody. The bad hand that was my life was mine, and mine alone to fix.” I always tell people that no matter how many self-help books you read but you are not ready to do something about your situation, very little will change. It’s like Faith without Action. When your faith is not accompained by acts, that’s asking too much from God yet you are not bring anything to the table.

“My mother’s relief was short-lived. When the cops arrived, Trunnis met them at the door. They looked over his shoulder toward my mom, who stood several paces behind him, her face swollen and caked with dried blood. But those were different days. There was no #metoo back then. That shit didn’t exist, and they ignored her. Trunnis told them it was all a whole lot of nothing. Just some necessary domestic discipline.”

This reminds me of the many women who die as a result of domestic violence. But due to the fact that their abusers are influential men in society, those cases die on the “hill of we are still investigating”. In as much as Jackie (David’s mother) had a chance to report the abuse, the police wasn’t of any help.

Goggins story is a clear example that what you have been through in life doesn’t define who you really are and can do!

To divert a little, yesterday I was watching a #BBNaija presentation on #GBV with the theme #NoMeansNo. According to their script, there’s a gentleman who grows up in a family where his father is a supposed cheat, barely has money to support the family and a mother who is violent.

As a result of that (disoriented family), this gentleman turns out as a rapist. Huh, I actually didn’t buy this story! Yes, charity begins at home but also yes, like David says, “If you choose to see yourself as a victim of circumstance into adulthood, that callous will become resentment that protects you from the unfamiliar. It will make you too cautious and untrusting, and possibly too angry at the world. It will make you fearful of change and hard to reach, but not hard of mind.”

In this life there are countless trails to self-realization, though most demand intense discipline, so very few take them. In southern Africa, the San people dance for thirty hours straight as a way to commune with the divine. In Tibet, pilgrims rise, kneel, then stretch out face down on the ground before rising again, in a ritual of prostration for weeks and months, as they cover thousands of miles before arriving at a sacred temple and folding into deep meditation. In Japan there’s a sect of Zen monks that run 1,000 marathons in 1,000 days in a quest to find enlightenment through pain and suffering. I don’t know if you could call what I felt on that bed “enlightenment,” but I do know that pain unlocks a secret doorway in the mind. One that leads to both peak performance and beautiful silence.

If you’re looking for a really good read, get you this book. You won’t regret it!


A review: RELATIONSHIP GOALS by Michael Todd

“As a matter of fact, when most people think about
relationships, they do not think about church or Christians as a
source of wisdom at all. It’s sad. But if we’re honest, we can admit
that many believers have failed at relationships, so we don’t have
as many great examples to model after as we should. Far too many
saved, sanctified, Sunday school–lovin’, stompin’ and clappin’
saints die lonely, and far too many preachers travel the world for
ministry but have failed marriages and no real friends. It’s no
secret that the church hasn’t done a great job at confronting real￾life issues, so many of us didn’t have much choice but to allow
movies, TV shows, each big cousin who had a new girlfriend every
Thanksgiving, and the slew of instafamous people who take great
filtered photos to become our relationship gurus.” When I read this line, I knew that I got to prepare for a rollercoaster of lessons.

Relationship Goals is not just a nice but great book about Dating, Sex & Marriage. It is basically about your relational life with God and people.

Relationship Goals is the kind of book that helps you learn to unlearn certain so many habits.

My highlight is on page 207 – Cut Out Unspoken Expectations. I am definitely “Todd” in that story. I always have unspoken expectations. I always expect people to do things for me because I feel they are obvious _ like you got to know at least. I struggle with this a lot.

What makes this book even interesting is Todd’s writing style. The use of verses/references from cellular songs. Using God’s word to help you understand & work on your relational life.

Todd is one of the contemporary preachers who makes it easy to listen to him without feeling judged.

The book will also improve your relationship with God, friends & family. Generally people.

Anyone read this book? Kindly share with me your highlights . . .

Book Review: The Girl With The Louding Voice By Abi Dare

The Girl With Louding Voice By Abi Dare

Thanks to the lockdown, I am back to reading. . . I will be sharing book reviews about the different books i have read.

📚: “The Girl With The Louding Voice” by Abi Dare is a beautiful story about persistence, the patriarchy and the power of women.

The story is about Adunni, a girl of 14 years who is forced to get married to an old man (about 56-60yrs) because her father thinks he will redeem their family from financial problems. Adunni is an ambitious girl who wants to go to school (get an education and have a “louding voice”) and become an “important” person so that she is able to change the livelihood of her family and the people of Ikati.

The tragic death of Khadija is the turning point. When Khadija Morufu’s second wife dies in the hands of Adunni. This forces her to run away to the Lagos. Kola gets her a job as a housemaid at Big Madam’s house where she is often abused by her and nearly raped by her husband (Big Daddy). While working at Big Madam’s she meets Tia & Kola who help her get enrolled in school.

“Rise above whatever life throws at you.”

“When you get up every day, I want you to remind yourself that tomorrow will be better than today. That you are a person of value. That you are important.” Remember to believe in you and show yourself some self love today.

I love Abi’s style is so unique. Her use of non-standard English and sarcasm makes the story move along at a good pace.

A few highlights from the book

The Girl With The Louding Voice

Have you read this book? What were your thoughts? Please share with me in the comment section.